loving this LP. best tracks are 'kiss with a fist' and 'drumming song'!!!

loving this LP. best tracks are 'kiss with a fist' and 'drumming song'!!!

Normally I do not mind the fog. Actually, I rather like it. The San Francisco bubble/micro-environments keep the pollution and heat out — but, today, I would much prefer to have the sun back. Therapy Day was not as difficult as usual but the therapist always leaves me with so many thoughts to think about. Like, she asked me some specific questions about my childhood. After rambling on and on she made an interesting observation:

“Why do you think that you are able to speak so casually and humorously about events that strike me as so devastatingly horrible?”

Those were not her exact words. I am paraphrasing my therapist. Anyway, I’ve been thinking about that ever since she made the observation. I think “survival” is the easiest answer, but perhaps it runs deeper than that. …Everything seems to run deeper than I expect. But, she is exceptional and I think I am begining to feel myself slip back in from time to time. I think things are getting better. But, she cautioned me that “we” have a lot of work to do. I guess I’m still looking at a couple of years of this sort of self-examination/reflection before the tools one needs to cope with PTSD are going to be useful. Chin up and pushing forward.

Donut Holes. little book.

Donut Holes. little book.

I gave an online interview with a book website yesterday. They seemed to like what I had to say and it will be published soon. Hmmm… I will put up a link whenever that happens. Interestingly, a critic in France is about to publish a review of my book. B does Google searches for it — and I have as well. After digging thru the Google search engine I have found various websites in the US, Canada, Germany, France and the UK are selling it. When I click on to the link it normally brings one to the US site. It looks like Green Apple ( a cool San Francisco Indie-Bookstore ) will be stocking it soon. And, a couple of other indie stores seem interested. I am dependent upon my mother to work on them. Can’t seem to get up the energy to deal with it myself. Frustrating.

Also, I think I have mixed feelings I had not expected to come up. I think I’m a very open person about my life, self and experiences so it seems odd to me that I feel a bit odd about the book. I’m glad there are a few people who seem to like it and buying it, but something about it is worrying to me. I published it for myself. …And, I think something in me wanted to try and reach people who are going through or who have been through similar horrors as myself. Much like the writings of Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore has done for me. His writing just seems to help me. His latest book is called “So Many Ways to Sleep Badly”

He is a true writer. I think I’m a dabbler. I have all the angst of an artist, but am not one. But, I do hope my book is funny to people. Life is funny. Growing up is awkward and there is so much humor to find in the adventure of it all.

Mattilda's excellent book!

Mattilda's excellent book!

Mattilda lives in San Francisco as well, but I’ve never met him. I just communicate with him via his blog.

I’ve “discovered” some more new music recently:

way cool and addictive smooth electronica-like musis! Get it!

way cool and addictive smooth electronica-like musis! Get it!

I’ve loved Grizzly Bear for a while, but this new LP is the best thing they have done! I guess it is considered electronica, but it sort of grows away from that genre. The lyrics are excellent and the mood is pitch-perfect. I love “Two Weeks” and “Cheerleader” …Can’t seem to play this LP enough! I suggest you get it as soon as possible.


despite the lame cover art, this LP is rather magical. really. it is.

despite the lame cover art, this LP is rather magical. really. it is.

…I don’t think there is a single lame track on the new Bat for Lashes LP. …but, what was she thinking with that cover? She seems to be a very free sort of artist. Tho, the sound is totally different — she reminds me a bit of Kate Bush. I used to think of Bat for Lashes as a knock off of my cheerished Goldfrapp. …but, this second LP is unique to itself.

Blah, Blah, Blah. I think this might be one of the dullest posts I’ve ever put up. Oh well. I’m enjoying FaceBook. And, the new issue of BUTT is quite a good read!

seems like BUTT is going back to more alt gay porn which is a good thing!

seems like BUTT is going back to more alt gay porn which is a good thing!

There are actually interviews and things to read and the erotic photos are not so mainstream in the last two issues. There is hope!

July 22, 2009. Tags: , , , , , , , , . Uncategorized.


  1. The Sagittarian replied:

    Oh this blog isn’t boring at all! You have an interesting take on life so it is a joy to pop in for a visit!
    The weather boffins have promised us snow tonight – and I’m holding them to it, I want snow and I want snow NOW!

  2. Brent replied:

    I’ll take the weather in S.F. anyday over the Heat of Phoenix.

    Your book sounds intriguing. May have to check it out.

  3. Urspo replied:

    I too find your writing interesting – that is why I am coming back.

  4. matty03 replied:

    The Sagittarian! Ahhhh, thank you for being so sweet. Wow! Snow! Seems so strange that it is snowing somewhere. I used to love the snow, but after just at 13 years of it in Boston/New Hampshire I had experienced enough of it for a lifetime. Give me sun, breeze and the ocean. Tho, for the last couple of days it has just been fog. Tho, SF has these micro-climates. We live in the foggiest/coolest area of the city — but we ususally get sun every other day — especially this time of year. Oh well. Hope you’re making snow angels! love and kisses, matty

  5. matty03 replied:

    Brent! Oh, but Stevie Nicks lives where you are! That must spread a lot of feathers, glitter and magik in your air! Come to San Francisco! The book. If you do, let me know what you think. I have such mixed feelings about putting some of those events into a book. Trying to reconcile them. Thanks for stopping by! I shall have to see if you’ve a blog I can visit!!

  6. matty03 replied:

    Urspo! Thank you. But, I find your blog to be most excellent. I keep looking for your vid-clip vlogs, but I can’t seem to locate them now. ? Must figure out where they are. Are they on a different site/page than your blog?

  7. brand new woo replied:

    your book is wonderful, matty. enjoy it. and you never know who you might be reaching with it, so good on ya!

  8. matty03 replied:

    Alan! Thank you. You make me feel so good. …You are a REAL writer!

    …I don’t know. I hope it does help someone.

    I fear it probably just confuses and annoys most.

    …we shall soon see what the French critic has to say. ugh!

  9. matty03 replied:

    I wonder, is it normal for a critic to ask to review your book? Tell me, Alan. Tell me!

  10. Bokep 3gp replied:

    Nice info, useful for my job… thanks for share, keep posting… 🙂

  11. matty03 replied:

    Bokep 3gp! Cool — oh, I don’t think I’ll ever stop blogging.

  12. iPod transfer replied:

    Absolutely with you it agree. Idea excellent, I support.

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