dark
i thought i was dying
i held you tight
so tight it must have hurt
and now
sitting alone
catching my pulse
i close myself into a fist
pulling the fire into my lungs
i know i am not alone
i know i am not dying
but, i am so weary
like “they” say —
fact is so much stranger than fiction
Steve Rebooted replied:
I’m sorry things aren’t great. But the way you expressed it, is absolutely beautiful.
April 3, 2008 at 6:08 am. Permalink.
Pants replied:
I just hugged you…did you feel it?
April 3, 2008 at 11:33 am. Permalink.
ing replied:
Fact is so much tougher to manage than fiction, but fiction gets us through it, yeah? (Helps me, anyway.)
April 3, 2008 at 4:50 pm. Permalink.
pakipoptart replied:
You’ve definitely been on my mind. Wondering is he ok? Is he making progress? I hope, I hope, I hope…
April 3, 2008 at 7:40 pm. Permalink.
The sagittarian replied:
“closed myself up like a fist” – very very nice! I do believe this is progress, buddy boy!! 🙂
April 4, 2008 at 4:05 am. Permalink.
matty03 replied:
Steve – You know, things are better. But, as you know, some days (and nights) are tougher than others. Thank you for the sweet compliment.
April 4, 2008 at 9:43 am. Permalink.
matty03 replied:
Pants – I think I did! I can use all the hugs I can get! Sending one back to you right now. Hope you caught it.
April 4, 2008 at 9:44 am. Permalink.
matty03 replied:
Ing – Yes. I understand what you mean. I think music gets me through things more than anything, really. I guess that is fiction in some ways. Tho, I find a great deal of truth in it. Same idea, tho. I should think.
April 4, 2008 at 9:45 am. Permalink.
matty03 replied:
pakipoptart – Thank you, sweetie. Yeah, I am making progress. It appears to be such a slow train of a journey, tho. But, make the journey I shall! And, will be all the stronger for it.
The Sagittarian – I’m glad you caught that. Yeah, I’m fighting back to pull myself back to me, my loved ones and my life. I am getting there. But, that night, it felt like I was dying. Scary feeling.
April 4, 2008 at 9:47 am. Permalink.
johnmichael replied:
Big hug buddy!
April 4, 2008 at 10:56 am. Permalink.
matty03 replied:
johnmichael – Thank you — kisses from O-town.
April 4, 2008 at 11:00 am. Permalink.
The sagittarian replied:
Self trust Matty, and being kind to yourself. You will get through this, you have so much ahead of you not to!! 🙂
April 4, 2008 at 12:15 pm. Permalink.
pakipoptart replied:
Matty! I’m so happy to hear this! Actually I didn’t think the poem was completely sad. I felt there was a lot of hope in the struggle from reading it. Also thank you for the sweet comment you left on my blog! ( :
April 4, 2008 at 4:40 pm. Permalink.