…nothing is as refreshing as being tag’d by Cool Old Cheeser! And, I’ve been holiday tag’d by him. Being the brave trooper that I am not, I am forging ahead despite my cold and general confusion!

“When people say ‘Christmas’ you immediately think…”

I tend to get excited because it means I can play my Carnie & Wendy Wilson Christmas CD in peace! “Hey Santa” is the absolute best Christmas record ever made! Seriously! It is cheezy, overtly happy and puts a tap in your step! Don’t believe anyone who tries to tell you otherwise! Seriously!

“Favourite Christmas memory…”

Christmas morning 1975. 9 years old! My present was the “Lazy Afternoon” LP by Barbra Streisand! I was so excited and happy! I remember being so upset with my Grandmother who always gave me $3 to buy a record album at K-Mart once a month. And, she and my Mom would not let me get “Lazy Afternoon” — so I had gotten a Bay City Rollers LP instead. My mom has a picture of me holding the record from that morning. If I had it, I would scan it and post it for your viewing pleasure. I used to like to imagine that I could climb into the cover of this record and lay on Barbra’s luxurious sofa and look at all her pretty things! Wouldn’t Barbra’s living room circa 1975 be so cool and comfortable?!?!?!? Mmmmmmmm, delicious.

“Favourite Christmas song/carol…”

“Hey Santa” by Carnie & Wendy Wilson! Duh! However, I’m also quite fond of “Silent Night” as interpreted by one, Miss Stevie Nicks. …High Priestess of Rock. I especially like the part where Robbie Neville goes all R&B on her ass as he “harmonizes” with her. Not one to be out done, she matches his fever’d singing! I figure that they must have been having a lot of sex at the time or a one hit wonder would have never been singing with her. But, who knows? C’est la vie!

“Favourite Christmas movie…”

Oh, easy one! NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION! I can watch this movie over and over again and still laugh every single time. I love it when Juliette Lewis (the Sandy Dennis of my generation!) becomes frozen from the waist down as the Clarks hunt down the perfect tree! …and, who couldn’t love Aunt Bethany!?!?! “Clark? Is this the airport?” … “Don’t push me down, Clark!” …that would be Aunt Bethany’s jello mold. Oh dear. She wrapped her cat again by mistake.

I had a friend in the early 90’s who could repeat every single line from this film with imitations of all the voices. And, he would do this to us when we were stuck on a crowded subway train causing great embarrassment! Good times!

I also really like MEET ME IN ST LOUIS — which I consider a Christmas movie. Maybe it isn’t, tho. However, this Judy Garland film has more hot men per average than any other movie you will ever see! It is true! …even the guy who drives the milk wagon is hot! The dad is hot! …and, then, there is the boy next door! And, Lon! And, the guy to Judy’s left on the trolley! The male hotness just never stops in this movie! And, I think it is a Christmas movie. Isn’t it?

“Favourite Christmas character…”

Aunt Bethany! …or the guy to Judy’s left on the trolley in MEET ME IN ST LOUIS.

“Favourite Christmas ornament/object…”

Now, this is a tough one for me. I have to narrow it down to three:

1. The two Andy Warhol-like angels my Grandmother gave me when I was 5. If I were not so sick and lazy I would take a picture and post it.
2. My Barbra Streisand ornament that came with her second Christmas LP which would be my fave had Carnie & Wendy not made their LP. …both of these records are produced by the same genius, by the way! …the ornament looks just like the one on the cover of her second Christmas LP! Miss S was most impressed by it last weekend!! Ing always marvels at the sheer brilliance of this particular ornament. …this is Ing from last year helping me and B put up our tree — when she first marveled at the magic of the Barbra ornament. She helped us again this year, but I don’t think I took any pictures. So, this one from last year will have to do. She looks amazing! …as always.
3. A really beautiful hand-crafted penguin which me and B purchased this year and hung on our tree! We discovered that we both love penguins! It was quite romantic and I love this ornament. …this is probably my true fave. Once again, too lazy to take a picture at the moment.

“Plans for this Christmas…”

Well, this year it will just be me, B and Little Bagel. And, really, that is all I need! Ing is going to visit Hell, um, her parents this year so she can’t join us. Alan is going to be with his family as well. Anyway, we will have a lovely day!

“Is Christmas your favourite holiday?”

No. Too much religion tied up in it. I think I most enjoy Thanksgiving — and, besides, that is the evening we always put up the Xmas tree. I like to say Xmas more than Christmas.

I don’t care to actually tag people, but I’d be curious to see how Dessie and Gina would answer these questions. But, they are not tag’d.

However, I think I will tag Ing and Miss S. Just cuz!

December 18, 2007. Uncategorized.


  1. diamondfistwerny replied:

    Great MeMe, and um….getting Barbra for Xmas at that age shoulda been a cue that you were queer 😛

  2. scarlet hip replied:

    You are too adorable.

  3. Miss S replied:

    Yeah! Tagged! My answers are up!

    Thank you for the awesome time this weekend, Matty. It’s nice to have family away from family. I’m glad I got to meet you this year.

    I was just writing this and I couldn’t remember the spelling difference between meat and meet (you see, I am convinced I have been inhaling lead–but this is a different and wonderful story for another day). Wouldn’t it be weird if I had the chance to meat you? It doesn’t sound right at all!

  4. matty03 replied:

    Mr. Diamond! I know! For years, Barbra was blamed for my gayness!

  5. matty03 replied:

    Scarlet Hip! Awwwwwww, I’m all a-blush! But, you are the beautiful one!

  6. matty03 replied:

    Miss S! I can’t wait to check it out! …and shall in a few if I have anything to say about it! I’m very glad we met this year, too! And, yeah! We had a great time did we not?!?!? I was so relieved. I feel like such a loser as of late!

    …Um, yeah. If we were to “meat” each other it would be one of those XTube moments.

  7. Old Cheeser replied:

    Well done Matty and thanks! Nice selection of photos to back up your points too.

    Aaah yes I remember you commenting on “Hey Santa” last year. So intrigued was I, I downloaded the tune and now have it burned on an Xmas CD, you’ll no doubt be pleased to hear. So it will definitely get a playing over the festive period. Nothing wrong with cheesy, either, obviously (I think that’s what you meant when you said “cheezy”?! Or perhaps that is just the US spelling!) By the way, whatever happened to Wilson Phillips?

    As for your favourite memory, I am slightly confused. What you meant was that your Ma and Grandmother refused to let you buy the Babs album, but you got it for Xmas anyway? I am loving the cover and as you say it looks very plush. It’s funny to think that you were so into her at a mere 9 years old, a sure sign of where you were heading (not to mention the pink cover!)

    Stevie Nicks. Mmmm. She’s not my favourite female artiste, although I do love a lot of her stuff with Fleetwood Mac. No offense but I find her voice slightly grating (I’m sure years of coke consumption didn’t help – and I’m not talking about the liquid variety…) I know that track and didn’t realise that Robbie Neville was singing on it! And actually wasn’t he a 2-3 hit wonder? Remember “Dominoes” and “What’s It To Ya?” after “C’est La Vie”? (Well they were hits in the UK, not sure about the States….) But once again it begs the question, whatever happened to Raunchy Neville?

    National Lampoons – ha ha! I have to say I’m not a major fan of these films but they’re reasonably entertaining I guess (he said begrudgingly). Meet Me In St Louis is one film I have never seen and must (particularly if it has such an array of hot men, as you say…)

    Aunt Bethany? Who she?

    The Babs ornament is lurvely. But dare I say, she looks somewhat airbrushed?!

    I’m sure you, B and Bagel will have a great time. In your new pad, like us! Nice to have some quality time on your own.

    And not celebrating it over here, I am curious to know what Thanksgiving is like and why you prefer it to Xmas. Well I think you’ve kind of hinted at that already by saying you don’t like the religious side of Crimbo.

    Anyways have a fabulous holiday and thanks for some informative answers!

    OC xxx

  8. matty03 replied:

    Cool Old Cheeser! Wow! If I had a cookie to send, you would receive it! Love long comments! To clarify and provide further info:

    I’m thrilled I turned someone else besides B, Ing, Miss S and Alan on to “Hey Santa!” — that is my own silly way of spelling “cheesy” like the way I prefer a “‘d” to “ed” to the past tense. Just me being silly — or, let us say “cool” — I haven’t any idea what happened to Wilson Phillips but the world needs them now more than ever!!! Come back to the Five & Dime, Wilson Phillips, Wilson Phillips!

    Yes, I do believe my Grandmother and Mom were keeping me from buying Lazy Afternoon because my Grandmother had already bought it to give me for Xmas. Oh, dear. I was into Barbra at 4 years of age when I demanded an LP after seeing WHAT’S UP DOC and my mom explained that Barbra Streisand was a singer. To be true, I think Barbra got me thru a very rough childhood. That voice sort of saved me. Gave me hope. It still does.

    Oh, well you know — in parts of Texas you can get beaten for saying anything negative about Stevie Nicks, Led Zep or L. Skynard! You have to be cautious! But, quite luckily, I adore Ms. Nicks. I’ve always enjoyed gravel-voiced divas! But, Stevie is the best! I do think she is a poet. Anyway, you must love her cover of Silent Night! It, um, rocks!

    Robbie Neville. Where is he? Does he still have that hair? Yes, I know all of his tunes from his first album as I secretly owned the cassette and kept it hidden in my car! There are parts of Texas where one can be beaten for admitting you like Robbie Neville — at least in the mid-to-late 1980’s! As far as I know he had only one hit in the US, but he was soooooooooooo sexy! Stevie was so lucky but I sort of wish she hadn’t let him sing on her song, but it does add some “chezzy-ness” to it!

    Old Cheeser! Aunt Bethany is a character from NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION! Now, I know you say you don’t like it but I think you need to see it again just so you are more familiar with Aunt Bethany who was played by one of the Great Broadway actresses of our time! I think she is dead now, but she once played Woody Allen’s GIANT mother in NY Stories and made fun of Babs in FUNNY GIRL! And she is so funny in CHHRISTMAS VACATION!

    THANKSGIVING is when we US citizens celebrate stealing this country from the American Indian! But, I like to think of it as the day we can all eat as much turkey, stuffing and sweets as humanly possible. Hang out with family — in my case that is B, Ing and Bagel — Alan usually has other plans as does Miss S — and my mom and brother are in such far away places. However, my mom came for this last one. Then, it is our practice, to decorate the house for Xmas! The tree goes up and Hey Santa! gets played and we have much fun.

    Thanksgiving is a nice day.

    kisses from the ghetto fabulous of Oakland,

  9. Dessie replied:

    Consider it done my love 😉

  10. matty03 replied:

    Dessie! What is to be done? I hope a package reaches you before the holiday!!!!! kisses, matty

  11. Old Cheeser replied:

    Thanks for the response Matty!

    Ah I see about “cheesy”/”cheezy”, just me putting on my English teacher hat I guess! Perhaps we ought to set down a “Locate Wilson Phillips” detective agency like the Charles Townsend one. Or perhaps Mum Michelle P. might help. Mind you, she was last seeing doing weird things in Knots Landing…

    Good to know that Queen Babs was your saviour from an early age. I understand the Xmas story now. It’s always awkward when your folks have got you the present you want and they have to come up with some “ingenious” excuse to prevent you from actually going out and buying it yourself!

    I think your description of Ms Nicks as “gravel-voiced” is spot-on! To be honest I’m not crazy about her cover of “Silent Night” but that’s just me! Thank the lord I don’t live in Texas eh?

    After our conversation I actually went on Amazon and typed in Robbie Neville and it seems he brought out a few more albums up until the early 90s…then he vanished…

    Okay, the next time National Lampoon’s Xmas Thingy is shown I will make myself sit down and watch it, in order to re-assess my critical opinion. And is the actress you are talking about Mae Questel by any chance? Yes I remember her in that Wooody film, the one where she appears in the sky screeching “Sheldon!” at him?

    Rather a strange thing to celebrate when you think about it – Thanksgiving that is. Do you and your fellow Yanks ever think about the irony as you tuck into your food? Sorry, couldn’t help a bit of guilt-tripping there!

    Whatever happens, have a fab Xmas – eat, drink and be evergreen! Be as soft as an easy chair!

    OC xxx

  12. matty03 replied:

    Cool Old Cheeser! LOL! Yes, I think we all see the tragic irony of the holiday! Not something one should really celebrate — and on top of that we’re still fighting that whole puritanical thing in the 21st Century! …ugh!

    YES! That is the actress!!!! She was awesome!

  13. karyn replied:

    National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation – Best. Holiday. Movie. EVER. EVAH!!!!

    “If he keeps it up, it WILL be his last Christmas.”

    Love it.

  14. matty03 replied:

    Karyn! YES! At last someone else admits to getting it!!!!

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