MY OWN PERSONAL PEYTON PLACE

I’m feeling much better! Last week (and, really, the week before pretty much sucked!) So my hope is that this week will totally rock! Sometime in between doctor visits, drug-induced sleeping and writhing about in pain — I heard some of our neighbors saying the most interesting things! It was total scandal! I’m telling you! Not to sound like This Block of Castro’s Rona Barrett, but I took note of a few of the random comments made between neighbors, their guests and prospective domestic engineers! I shall share a few choice comments as I heard them. Who knew such things happened here while I am normally at work!?!?!?
…and, I suppose I heard everyone all the better because my head hurt too much to play music. It was just me lying on the floor as these random conversation echo’d thru our building’s light well. “We were out of lube, but we brought some of the rope we had mentioned during our chat.”

“Do you have change for a hundred?”

“Oh, daddy! Yes! Yeah, man! Ah, daddy, I’ve been very baaaaaad!”
(slap/snap/groan)
“Get it, boy!”

“You will need to be cool with starting work at 9am sharp every Wednesday and Friday morning. We tend to have some extreme parties the night before and we want everything cleaned up by 2pm on those days!”

(shattering of glass)
“Oh, shit!”
(laughter)
“I’m so sorry!”
“Shut up pig! You’re about to pay for this mess!”
(odd sound/followed by thud/groaning/moaning)
“Oh, daddy!!!”


“I charge extra for cleaning toys and you have to agree to stock clean latex gloves or I will not touch them.”
“You mean you won’t clean the sink or —”
“Oh, sweetie no — or the floor unless you’ve moved the toys.”
“So, it’s a problem for you?”
“Oh, baby. No! But, I think of that shit like maids used to think of windows!”
(laughter)

“I just got your page. I only have half an hour so if this is going to be pulling taffy, we don’t have time. Your call.”

“Not so hard! Damn!”
(thud)
“Shut up, boy! You love it!”
“Time! Dude! This is not working for me! Give me a towel!”
“Oh, you little bitch!”
I am so not kidding! He actually wanted me to kiss him! And, after that! Jesus!”
(laughing)
“So, do you have that fifty I loaned you, babe?”
(door slam)
“Well, I guess you and I need to discuss a plan on how you’re going to pay me back. What’s up Monday morning? Yeah. OK. See you then, boy!
(scurrying down the stairs on his cell)
“No, honey. I’m just sayin’ that it tasted kind of funny. Not so much salty-bitter but more like salty-sour. Look! I’m just sayin’ you might want to have that checked ou—”
(building entrance door slams)

August 5, 2007. Uncategorized. 27 comments.

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