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ON THE ROAD AGAIN. …THE DATING ROAD, THAT IS!
It always looked so much fun in those old movies! You know, Annette and Frankie dating. Sure, they had problems but all worked out in the end and they had loads of fun and danced to really bad faux Beach Boys music. But this is reality, kids. And, you better sit down.
Now, I am a male but I don’t know or understand men any better for being one.
A few questions to which I suspect there are no direct answers:
1. Why do some guys get so serious about it? I mean, just because we’re dating doesn’t mean we have to get married next week.
2. Why so many silly games? If you want to call me — call me. If I want to call you I am going to call you.
3. I’m not a prude, but at 39 I really want more than just a cheap night of sex. No ring required, but I want to know the person and know that we’ll continue to get to know each other. Getting laid is so easy — why bother dating if that is all you want??!?!
4. And, why do most guys get more interested when you become less interested?!?!?!
I shrug. I roll my eyes. I get dressed for my date and hope to impress. Hope to win a heart and give mine away. And, I pray that he doesn’t toss it about like a football.
Matty's Bit Of Space 
Jon replied:
Gay dating is certainly an adventure, that’s for sure.
Many gay men are immature, many are oversexed, many are good catches who are taken, and many have serious self esteem issues. Good luck finding that catch, and report on your date 🙂
April 3, 2006 at 9:28 pm. Permalink.
matt replied:
Jon — Amen! Well, it is more like “dates” …I’ve had several in the last couple of weeks.
April 3, 2006 at 9:40 pm. Permalink.
g8s replied:
Getting laid is easy…’
Are you kidding? I’ll have what you’re having…
April 4, 2006 at 12:05 am. Permalink.
ing replied:
Sounds like gay dating is pretty similar to straight dating. Except for the “less interested” part. With straight guys (in my experience), my lack of interest doesn’t make anyone more interested. I get the rare scary stalker type and loads of men who really aren’t interested in me and my wrinkles but pretend to be for as long as it takes, which isn’t nearly long enough to understand me in any way.
But it is pretty easy to get laid. Easy, though, is soo dull. . . I’d love to meet someone who could see past my appearance (I’m quite average-looking & please don’t dispute this) and figure out that I’m a pretty neat person. Which mostly takes time, getting to know someone.
It was so much easier when I was in my twenties. People didn’t seem so set on diving into a long term right off the bat. I do understand the sadness of the prospect of dying alone and unloved. But I’d much rather wait for the right person & risk being alone than forge something out of mutual fear & then call it love. I mean, no!
April 4, 2006 at 12:39 am. Permalink.
Dessie replied:
Dependency is dangerous though. Don’t wait for someone to validate you.
And Ing, I think you’re pretty attractive, you know, for a woman and all 😉 And I don’t give compliments lightly!
April 4, 2006 at 5:22 am. Permalink.
matt replied:
Gator! Sex is muy easy! …if you want that only. It would be especially easy for you, but you’re married! Color me jealous!
Ing — You are hot. Men look at you all the time when we walk about the city. But, I know what you mean about this new level of “desperation” we encounter the 30’s start to end. It’s like a mad dash for companionship and yet everyone still anticipates perfection from the “other party” but not from themselves. Odd, that. …but, mark Dessie’s words!
April 4, 2006 at 6:24 am. Permalink.
Chris Capp replied:
Hi Matt,
Just read your previous post — congrats on what sounds like a year of incredible change! Did you really lose 80 pounds??? Unbelievable.
As for relationships and dating, I was once in a really bad film with Quentin Crisp [no … really bad!] and he played half of a very long-term gay couple whose partner said, “A gay marriage is like any other marriage. Only more so.”
I know it’s a cliche, but when you least expect it, expect it.
April 4, 2006 at 10:39 am. Permalink.
Robert replied:
Those are awful good question Matt, but people are just people I guess… some grow old and not grow up, and I think I’m fluxin’ between the two! 🙂
Games I do not like, I’ve always stayed away from those. Life’s too short for games! Tho when I was single, I thoroughly enjoyed my single days [aka whoring]! haha! You’re a good catch Matt [cuz I’ve seen those half nekkid pictures of you on your very blog, and that you have a good heart, too! heh!]. Just be you [which you are] and enjoy the scenary.
April 4, 2006 at 10:41 am. Permalink.
ginab replied:
N’kay, I’m going to chime in: I get nobody. I don’t even get a hello. Not that I want stalkers, I’ve had stalkers complete with fan letters. I’ve had scum bags mistake me for page numbers and scene stills.
I think nobody says hello because I have a reputation. I’ve heard I’m “mysterious” and this is why no one says hello. I say rubbish. Complete whimpass rubbish. I’m no mystery. I’m blunt: I think men play games because their dicks can’t talk, and that women need to keep their husbands in their pants (as in, ‘keep your husband in his pants’).
I’m sure it only gets better.
-g+bb
April 4, 2006 at 1:49 pm. Permalink.
matt replied:
It is just so funny to me how complicated
“we” all make things!
Chris — WOW! That is so cool that you got to meet AND work with him!!!!
Robert — You are so sweet! But, I don’t think anyone’s breaking down my door! LOL!
Gina — They need to get over it! You rock!
April 4, 2006 at 8:45 pm. Permalink.