My friend, Vic, feels that this is the ugliest piece of “art” he has ever seen and it saddens him that it holds such a prominient place in the city. I understand his viewpoint, but I kind of like it. It is so odd that I enjoy looking at it. In addition, it is an interactive fountain which is designed so that you can walk inside and around the structures as the water pours forth. You can’t see this due to my lacking skills as a photographer. Also, for some reason, the fountain was off. They are setting up for some sort of event. It is either going to be a jazz festival or a special farmer’s market. …at least that is what the homeless guy told me.

Update on interviews: My interview today went well — ran for just over an hour and I made “the cut” and am being asked to return next week to meet with one of the firm’s officiers. However, I’m not sure I “bonded” or “connected” that well with the individual who interviewed me. Tho, I must have done well enough to still be in consideration — I think I have a much better shot at the job for which I have my second interview tomorrow. So we shall see!!! This will be another committee interview. It is a good thing I am not shy.

I was not at all nervous — until AFTER the interview as I was walking down Market Street and I had a mini-panic attack. I’m such a loser. I phoned Milford and Alan — but got Milford’s voicemail and Alan was busy working — I could not calm down. I was just upset. So, I spent money I didn’t have and saw a movie.

Sometimes, it is the only thing that works for me.

I saw Bergman’s SARABAND — his final film and continuation of SCENES FROM A MARRIAGE (a must see for anyone who has ever been married or in a serious relationship — if you haven’t yet done that, this film will only horrify you) If you like Bergman or Liv U — then you do not want to miss this movie. I do not cry in movies. Actually, I hardly ever cry. Like Alice Cooper, my heart’s a virgin. It ain’t never been tried… However, there were two scenes where this amazing actress almost brought me to tears. She certainly had this impact on my fellow film-goers.

Is there a point? Well, I think Bergman has always made the same point over and over — ultimately relationships suck. They are heartbreaking and, in the end, it often seems that nothing works the way it should when two souls connect — however, one can never lose sight of how very important these connections are for all of us. …whether we want to admit it or not — we all want to be in love and loved back.

Woody Allen, who has adored/copied/glorified Bergman for the run of his film career said this sweetly in films like ANNIE HALL and MANHATTAN — and, so have countless other film makers — but few manage to cut to the core of it without any fear the way Bergman tackles this fragile human puzzle. Painful, tragic, sad — but ultimately poetic and beautiful — I loved this movie. And, from a purist standpoint, it was cool to see how the characters I fell in love with turned out 30 years later. As with life, they didn’t turn out the way I would have imagined or liked — but I suspect that they turned out the way they were meant to. …and, we all know that Bergman’s films are reflections of his own life, feelings and relationships. His work has always been quite personal and confessional. This might be why Liv Ullman is so effective — I suspect, in many ways, she is playing out what she has lived. I read a short interview with her about this film and she summed up the experience of returning to Bergman to make this film as both magical and cruel. Interesting.

…Oh, those wacky folks from Sweden with their niffty cars, ABBA and fearless views of human relationships. Maybe I could get a job in there!

July 27, 2005. Uncategorized.


  1. Underling replied:

    Glad to know you “made the cut”. Sorry about the panic that followed though.

    And crying at movies is a wonderful thing for me. I love it when a movie can drive me to tears. It’s so nice to cry about someone else’s predicament instead of my own.

  2. Karyn replied:

    Of course you made the cut. I have perfect faith in you. 🙂

    People who have never had anxiety issues can’t understand what it’s like when it rears its head and holds you hostage. It’s like you have separated from the world in your own little pod full of panic. You look around and wonder how the sun is still shining and how people are still laughing and chatting and acting like everything is fine when it’s so clearly not and oh my GOD your heart is about to pound right out of your ears and you’re turning purple and sweating and your whole face is throbbing and aaaaagh! No wonder a movie helps. It’s a place to sit, to be still, to focus elsewhere, in the chill, still dark of an upholstered theatre. With popcorn.

    I get it.

    And the thing about relationships is dead on too. We need them for selfish purposes, for developmental purposes – we just need them. But in the end, they bite you in the ass. Still, if you’re lucky, at the end of the day,you’ll think they’re worth it.

  3. snarl71 replied:

    Mattie – you could have called me! I’ve been known to console you before and assist during such attacks.

    Well, things sound promising so I’m sure the panic attack wasn’t warranted.

  4. g8s replied:

    Phew! You made the cut! Let me tell you, I have been waiting with baited breath (Baited with what? Don’t ask…) to hear the outcome of your interviews. Wouldn’t it be nice, after all your efforts, to have a choice of job offers?

    And as for your panic attack, well, next year, at this time, you’ll have a smile about it all, as you look back on these ‘salad days’…

  5. Doug replied:

    Matt…there was a time Liv Ullmann lived at the Ritz Carlton in Boston (she may still live there). She was a frequent customer of mine when I managed “The Lodge” clothing store there..she loved our sweaters and always bought them to send home to her nieces and nephews.

  6. adrock2xander replied:

    You forgot IKEA 🙂

  7. matt replied:

    Yeah, panic attacks suck — but they happen sometimes. I was amused that I got one AFTER the interview. LOL!

    Doug — Yeah, Liv’s ex-husband lives in one of the Charles River Towers — my understanding is that she has been staying with him for the last couple of years or so when she visits. I’ve a friend who’s sister works for him so I always get Liv scoop. LOL! She is awesome!

    adrock2zander — Oh, wow! How could I forget Sweden’s way-cool mod furniture designs! …and chain stores that causes pop culture’s heart to skip a beat!?!?!?!?

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