Off Line

The boxes are packed, the new furniture is assembled, the movers have been contracted, cable is scheduled to arrive, electric is set to roll and I picked up my keys today. I move to my apartment tomorrow.

This evening I went to the new place and just walked about the empty one bedroom apartment. It is quite nice. Somehow, tho — the emptiness combined with the sadness just made me feel like a little kid being left at his kindergarten class for the first time.

I sat on the living room floor and cried like a baby.

So many things I wish I could change, so many things I’ve never pursued and so many ideas wanting to take shape, but with no energy to allow them to form.

I left the apartment and returned to the condo. I comforted myself with the fact that I will feel better once my things are moved in and the pictures are hung.

It will be OK.

I will be off-line for the next couple of days. Hope to be up and running again by Sunday or Monday. Kisses from Boston!

December 1, 2004. Uncategorized.


  1. Will replied:

    Matt, best of luck and much happiness in the new apartment. It’s a fresh start, full of new opportunities. Take care, be well. Things WILL get better.

  2. Jon replied:

    It sounds exciting and painful at the same time, but without pain, one can’t grow. You will feel better one day soon, just hang in there!

    PS- dont you hate how the cable guys say ‘can you be in from 8Am until 8Pm?? I HATE that. Hopefully your building has a policy where you can sign some paper and have them come so you don’t have to wait around for them.

  3. no milk replied:

    i hate the cable guy. he didn’t want to be my boyfriend after he installed my cable.

  4. Tim replied:

    Wow, I hope it’s all going ok Matty …. come back to us soon!

  5. Anonymous replied:

    Hey Stud, I have been keeping up with you, and I wanted you to know that I care about you, and if I were there, I would take you to dinner and out to coffee everyday until you got better 🙂 You, as you know, will start to feel better–but in the meantime, go easy on yourself and do what you have been doing: crying and thinking. I care about you. Tony Hoshaw.–>

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