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The Importance of Concrete or It Ain’t Easy Being Green

It has been a year and we are not adjusting to condo-living very well. Aside from the hassles of dealing with a 80% population over 70 and their constant grumpiness — we just don’t like being told what to do and how to do it. There are more rules at our condo than can be imagined and almost none of them make any logical sense.

The 20% of us below the age of 40 spend much of our time trying to figure out how to pass an elder making their way down the hall with his/her walker. If we walk patiently behind them, they get angry and yell, “Go ahead! Pass!” If we say “Excuse me” and slip by them, they get angry and do one of those exasperated sighs and sometimes bang their walker up and down. I’ve decided the best thing to do is pretend like they are not there and rush past them. Makes ’em really pissy — but I figure this must provide them with additional things to be mad about it.

Anyway, we are thinking that we might need to sell the condo and purchase our own house. This opens a big ass can of worms. You see, the one thing I love about our condo in Salem is that it has an urban feel. When we left Boston I was terrified of going to the ‘burbs. I am most comfortable when surrounded by lots of concrete, police sirens and street vermin. I do not do well with green things, sounds of birds and loads of strollers. I am most happy in a city of concrete and steel. The less green — the better.

So, we started looking at houses. They all look like middle class family homes just waiting for beer bellies, rugrats and dirty carpets. Poor Karl is more open to the whole house thing and has less expectations. I want no yard to mow, no sidewalk to shovel snow. Most of all, I want no part of a porch. I also do not want to live next door to a family with children or those annoying yard doodles — you know, Virgin Mary statues and the like. Basically, I want my condo in house form. This isn’t going to be easy. Karl may end up putting me to the curb. Oh, yes, and I am not thrilled with all of these old homes. I want nothing to do with ghosts or things that go bump in the cellar. This should be loads of fun! Not!

Our shopping ventures to Boston and Cambridge were a hit in the sense that we got nearly all of the bday gifts. However, I was unable to locate “My Neighbour, Toroto” on DVD. I found it on video tape, but I do not purchase videos anymore. We purchsed our first bit of porn on DVD! It was a real rush to purchase DVD porn — We felt so 21st century. Anyway, I picked up a copy of the Speed Racer DVD! Yahoo! Go, Speedracer, Go! I’ve a friend who, as a child, had a crush on Speedracer’s Dad. I was less original and always longed for Speed. Can’t wait to sit down and watch the first 11 episodes!!!

I really love the new Mya CD. I sort of like the Ashanti CD excepting all the pro Murder Inc record label rapping between songs. And I am toying with the idea of picking up Beyonce’s new CD next week. Am I turning into an 8th grade black girl? If I am, I want to be called LaTeisha. I really think that name has a pretty sound and I think I would be popular at the mall with a name like LaTeisha.

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August 25, 2003. Uncategorized.

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